Tales from the Dance Jam #17
Sometimes I'm on. Sometimes I'm fully present. Sometimes I'm stuck way in my mind, or not feeling well, which detracts from my dancing. Last night my stomach was sour, which kept me from really feeling "in flow," right on, moving like a child of god. Well, three minutes on the dance floor cures all that, and I find I can sweat my prayers no matter what conditions are present. So I feel better, body exercising, gathering up energy from the room and moving through my body. Gathering up my prayers and spraying them around the room and into the cosmos. And the cosmos hears, oh yes, because the energy of movement comes on stronger.
So many beautiful people! Dear gods, you know it when you walk in the door and the room reeks of sweat and pheromones. This is earthy, this is the body, this is real. This is where the heavens meet the center of the earth, and we are the most potent tools of transformation. And dance is our work.
The warm room last night was filled with many beautiful people dancing contact improvisation, doing yoga, smiling at each other, talking, and really connecting. Ken had photography lamps bright on one corner, and a bizarre video camera contraption strapped to his body, filming a group doing some amazing contact dance. I couldn't even get on the floor because I was so entranced sitting on the sidelines watching. Not one beautiful longhaired man in the room - but instead six! For a total of nine the whole evening. I know, I'm sad, I'm counting longhaired men. Why not, it's a free country, and when you're dancing your prayers in public, you're inviting spectators. Call it "mutual support," because there's no ill-intent in gawking, only support for your dance, your skill, and the grace with which you lift your partner off the floor with such seeming ease. And your rippling muscles...
Oh, a quick story from last week, which was my first week back in this community after being gone to Europe for three months. That was a complete treat, and I spoke up in the circle to say that I looked for this kind of space in Europe and didn't really find it (although the Samsara dance in Stockholm was an amazing heart-centered space). "So pat yourselves on your backs for being here tonight and sweating your prayers!" Very lovely response; I think people took stock at that moment to count their blessings.
Then, sometime after the circle, this beautiful boy with long red hair was really getting his groove on. His style and form of dance was so intimately familiar; I swear I was watching myself dance! It was quite an odd experience, like looking into a curved mirror. He was vibrant and alive, yet I sat to the side of the room somewhat disappointed and taking myself waaay too seriously that I don't have intimate partnership and connections with boys who are, well, like me. So I began to move through this funkyness through dance, watching my body, playing with balance and center of gravity. The room was rather warm because of the body heat and summertime weather, and a large fan was blowing on the floor at the front of the room next to the DJ. Before too long, this boy was kneeling in front of the fan having his own journey into the wind - his red hair blowing out behind him as he writhed, bending forward in prayer then rising to the skies. It was hot - it was frustrating - it was freeing - it was complete ecstacy! Then, a woman whom I know came over behind him and was giving him bodywork in a sensual way while he continued his bowing and writhing.. this was also very hot. She and I made eye contact and had a lot of play with each other from a distance, which led to me coming over behind her to also give bodywork. See above stream of "it was..."!! The night is over now, last song, and we sit with hands on energy exchange - he is still in front of her, the exposed small of his sweaty back is mere inches, yet some part of me is still drenched in the ecstacy of the gods - there is no he, she, me, only a dancing flow of coloured energy coursing through the pores of existence itself. He gets up and walks away, and my friend and I are left sitting with each other, both gawking over him. I pass by him later intending to speak and exchange; he looks in the other direction and doesn't engage. At first I fault myself for not being more direct and stopping him to compliment him on his beautiful expression. I soon let that go and enjoy the fulfillment of this lovely evening of ritual and reflection.
Back to last night, some wonderful folks I know from a current bodywork intensive (but from other states) are here, very much into the moment and the experience of the dance. We connect together in the warm room to tone, do contact improv, meditate, sing, and make silly noises together while moving around on the floor. It was intimate and sweet, and cuddling with them was deeply supportive. I found places in my voice I didn't know existed, and the mutual expressions were astounding. At one point a woman came up to us, quite invasively, and said, "Excuse me, but I thought this was a dance space, not for massage.. if you all are going to do massage could you go somewhere else?" My friends were astounded, and I simply smiled and wouldn't engage her. As she continued to say stupid things, I said quite softly but very firm and direct: "This *IS* dance!!" To which she apologized and said she could see that in a way we were dancing. But as she continued to say stupid things, I closed my eyes, still imbued with smiling, and slipped into a trance beyond which any outer event could touch me. It was heaven. One friend was stretching my arms as I was trying to place my foot near the other one's ribs to support him as he bent forward across my body. We moved perfectly together without intervention from the egoic mind, slipping further into states of presence and ecstacy.
This is my community, where I go to temple. There's nothing quite like it; I found nothing of the sort traveling through Europe. It must be there, but it's not so open and available as this. And I keep learning about more events around the country - body choirs, dances of universal peace, dance "church"... what a gift to be in a place where people make themselves open and vulnerable to receive somatic healing. Brightest blessings to the lightbringers who draw the infinite power of the cosmos down to our sweet earth through the medium of their bodies.
Written 7/19/03
by Shaggy